"I need advice," Dave began our conversation. Dave is like many pastors who call Metanoia Ministries for counsel about how to handle conflict in their church.
Dave told me about Tom, a founding member and retired businessman in his church. "He acts like he is the boss and I am his employee," Dave explained, "constantly telling me what I did or said wrong."
A young leader is angered that the church Bible study she attends is now being taught by a kind but incompetent gentleman. The former teacher, who established and built the class, has been asked by the education director to take a new assignment.
The young leader does not want to see the class dwindle. Nor does she want to be a troublemaker. But she recently attended a seminar on leadership sponsored ...
ARTICLE The Emotions of Conflict The way to handle the most dangerous aspects of conflict is from the inside out. Richard Paul Minnich
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"I certainly see your point," Pastor Brown said. He kept his voice carefully modulated. Only his clenched hands betrayed his agitation, and neither Elder Peters nor Elder Roberts noticed.
"I'm really glad you're on our side, Pastor," Peters said, getting up from the couch. "I was afraid that this foolish proposal to turn an entire room over to the youth was going to be passed. I'm glad we'll avoid ...
It happened again and again: the
impasse, talking in circles, limited information. In my early years, I thought
all I needed was the best available information and some clear logic to make
the best decision. Every good leader wants logic and information for important
decisions.
But as I watched leaders who were consistently effective, I began to notice
something else. Leading well eventually ...
A fool gives full vent to anger, but a wise person quietly holds it back A hot-tempered person starts fights and gets into all kinds of sin. Proverbs 29:11,22
Lots of people have the power to hurt or frustrate me. But whether or not I express my anger when they do is my choice. People don't "make me" angry; I allow myself to express my anger. No one else can make me respond aggressively or inappropriately ...